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Overthrowing Perfectionism: One Small Task to Peace

Blog 2 in the Overthrowing Failure Series


1. Relatable Story – When Everything Gets Undone


You know what I hate about cleaning?


Everything gets undone. You make the bed—it’s unmade by night. You fold the laundry—there’s more by morning. You mop the floor—someone walks through with muddy shoes.


It’s not just exhausting. It’s defeating. A lot of work in life comes with visible progress. But not cleaning. You can clean all day, and the work vanishes before your eyes before the sun even sets.


That’s a mental kick in the teeth.


And to be fair, cleaning just physically sucks. But then again—I’d rather be sitting at a desk typing, so maybe that’s just me. :)


I’ll be honest: for a long time, I didn’t even see the mess. Not really. Not because I was lazy, but because I’d been trained to focus on what mattered: school, work, productivity. Cleaning didn’t register as valuable—especially when nothing ever stayed clean. Scrubbing a tub felt like wasted effort.


But here’s the thing—I do want to live in a clean house. I like the feeling of being in a space that’s been freshly cleaned. It makes me want to stay clean. It makes me want to sit down, exhale, and linger there. Clean spaces feel calm. Soothing. Settled.

And that caught my attention.


If cleaning is so “worthless,” then why does it affect my emotions this much? Why does a clean room make me feel grounded… and a messy one make me feel scattered?


That’s when I started to realize: even though I was raised to believe money-making work was what mattered—and cleaning was a thankless, nonpaying job—clearly there was something powerful going on here.


Because anything that impacts your nervous system that deeply? It’s not meaningless.


So why have we been taught to ignore it—or treat it like it doesn’t count?


2. Rooted Assumption – Worth Is Found in Production


We don’t always say it out loud, but many of us have absorbed this belief from school, work, and even church:

If it doesn’t produce results, money, or measurable progress—it doesn’t really count.

This mindset makes cleaning feel like wasted energy. It gets undone. It doesn’t generate income. And it rarely earns recognition. So even though we crave clean spaces, we subconsciously push it down the priority list—or judge ourselves for not doing it better.


This belief doesn’t look the same for everyone, but it tends to show up in at least one of these five ways:


1. The Perfectionism Trap

“If I can’t do it right, I won’t do it at all. ”This shows up in women holding themselves to impossible homemaking standards—trying to perform at 1950s levels while living in a 2020s pressure cooker. The result? Avoidance, guilt, and burnout.

2. The Overwhelm Spiral

“There’s too much to do. I don’t even know where to start. ”When every room needs attention and your brain is already maxed out, even a small task feels like climbing a mountain. This isn’t laziness—it’s cognitive overload.

3. The Productivity Filter

“Cleaning doesn’t ‘count’ like work does.” Many of us were trained to prioritize tasks that bring money, grades, or recognition. Cleaning doesn’t earn praise or paychecks—so it slides to the bottom of the list until chaos forces our hand.

4. The Creative Clash

“I’d rather do something meaningful. ”For creatives, thinkers, and dreamers, cleaning feels disruptive. It pulls focus away from writing, painting, planning, or building something that lasts. So we put it off… until the mess interrupts the creative flow anyway.

5. The Emotional Weight

“I don’t want to deal with what this mess brings up. ”In some cases, clutter is tied to grief, loss, or shame. Cleaning isn’t just physical—it’s emotional labor. And when the emotions are too big or too buried, it’s easier to look away.

Any of these sound familiar? You’re not alone. And none of them mean you’re failing. They just mean you’ve been taught to find your value in doing, performing, and producing.


But there’s a better way.


3. Re-examined Evidence – Why Small Wins Beat Big Efforts


Most women don’t need to be convinced that a clean space feels good. What they do need is permission to believe that small, imperfect efforts are not only enough—they're actually better for their emotional, mental, and physical well-being.


We’ve been told that “real” cleaning means hours of effort, spotless results, or some elusive weekend deep-clean. But neuroscience, psychology, and health research tell a different story:

Small, consistent actions create more peace, more motivation, and more lasting change.

Here's what research and psychology tell us about the Power of small wins:


Behavioral Activation Therapy (BAT)Used in treatment for depression and anxiety, BAT encourages small, manageable tasks to help people feel forward movement. Research shows that action precedes motivation—not the other way around. Doing something small each day restores a sense of agency and reduces emotional paralysis.


Dopamine and Task Completion Neuroscience tells us the brain releases dopamine when we complete a task—no matter how small. This “reward loop” encourages repeated behavior and boosts mood, confidence, and clarity.


Cognitive Load & Clutter Stress A cluttered environment increases cognitive load, making it harder to focus, rest, or regulate emotions. Even light visual clutter raises cortisol (the stress hormone), especially in women.


Identity-Based Habits (James Clear, BJ Fogg)Repeated small actions shape identity: “I’m someone who shows up.”This kind of habit formation is gentle but powerful, reinforcing emotional stability over time.


Maintenance Cleaning > Deep Cleaning (Environmental Health)Studies show that routine light cleaning is more effective at keeping surfaces hygienic than sporadic, high-effort deep cleans.

A 15-minute weekly rhythm (even if imperfect) is better for health than 3-hour sessions that leave you dreading next time.

4. Reframed Belief – Faithfulness, Not Finish Lines

For a long time, I believed what many women do:

If I only clean a little, the rest of the house will stay dirty. If I don’t get it all done at once, what’s the point?

But that belief kept me frozen. And ironically, it kept my house messier.


I’ve since learned the truth: faithfulness creates order—not finish lines. Showing up consistently, even for 10–15 minutes a day, actually keeps my house cleaner than those dreaded deep-clean weekends ever did.


It turns out, there’s real science behind this:

  • Maintenance prevents overwhelm.

  • Light cleaning outperforms occasional deep cleaning.

  • Completion calms the brain.

  • Habits shape identity.

  • Clean spaces invite more cleanliness.


Now, I know—it sounds unrealistic. One task a day? Won’t the rest of the house stay filthy?


But here’s what I’ve learned: cleaning isn’t just about what’s outside of you. It’s about what’s happening inside you.


Science backs it up—when you clean even one thing, your brain starts to settle. Visual clutter clears, and your mind gets a little quieter. It doesn’t seem like much, but over time, those small resets add up. The more consistently you show up, the more your mind renews itself—less dread, less guilt, more peace.


It reminds me of that verse:

“Be transformed by the renewing of your mind. ”Not by doing everything. Not by being perfect. But by showing up differently—day by day.

And what’s wild is... over time, it actually feels like the house doesn’t get as messy anymore. The mud tracks don’t seem to show up as much. The spills aren’t overwhelming. The chaos stops snowballing.


Why? Because you’re no longer living in chaos internally. You’ve begun to clean what matters most: your mind. And the house? It starts reflecting that back to you.

Faithfulness wins. Because the goal isn’t a perfect home. The goal is peace.

5.  Reflective Invitation – What If Peace Was the Goal?


Let’s be honest—most women aren’t dreaming of scrubbing baseboards. They’re dreaming of a home that doesn’t overwhelm them the second they walk in. A home where peace is possible, even when life is full.


So what if cleaning wasn’t about perfection, or about measuring your worth by what you accomplished today? What if it was about setting yourself up for the win—mentally, emotionally, even spiritually?


When we’ve internalized the voice of Pharaoh (a slave master) —do more, be more, clean more—it’s easy to feel like rest has to be earned. But God never asked us to serve a taskmaster. He asked us to walk in wisdom and grace. That means breaking big things down into simple rhythms. Small wins. Little faithfulness. Sustainable peace.


When you choose to do one small thing each day—wipe the mirror, sweep the floor, toss out the trash—you’re not just making the room better. You’re building a rhythm. A pattern of movement that gives your nervous system a new script: “We’re okay here. We’re not behind. We’re building forward.”


This kind of consistency lowers stress. It builds self-trust. It shifts your internal narrative from “I’ll never catch up” to “I’m creating calm.” And over time? That changes how you see yourself—and your space.


You don’t need to be caught up. You just need to show up.


So what’s one thing you could do today—not to prove your worth, but to protect your peace.

So let today be simple. Let it be small. Let it count.

🮟 My “One Win a Day” Cleaning Rhythm

(Feel free to steal, tweak, or toss it.)

Day

Focus Areas

Sunday

Sinks & Surfaces

Monday

Mirrors, Microwaves & Maintain Kitchen

Tuesday

Toilets & Tubs

Wednesday

Windows, Wardrobe & Water Plants

Thursday

Throw Away, Thread Count (Sheets), & Things (Misc.)

Friday

Floors & Fridge

Saturday

Sabbath Rest

This isn’t about finishing everything. It’s about finally feeling peace in the process.

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